Yesterday, I arrived in Phoenix almost 6 years after the last visit to my former home. The weather was sunny, about 60 degrees, a nice escape from the 40 degrees of fog and rain in Kentucky. Some stress from rushing to my connecting flight from Houston to Phoenix, but I made it with time to spare.
- Lunch at Alice Cooper’stown in downtown Phoenix. I’m a huge Alice Cooper fan. Buffalo chicken wrap with seasoned fries and Papago Brewing Company IPA.
- Cruise down in Indian School Road to revisit my 2008-2009 neighborhood where I walked around drunk often, having been recently dumped by my ex girlfriend who looked like Joan Jett at the time. Jeff Dahl Band disbanded. My other band The Earps on the decline, it seemed. Depressed. Lonely. Disconnected. Having thoughts of moving back to Kentucky. I remember thinking “I don’t want to still be drunk, alone in this backyard, in this tanking band when I’m 40”. That was 7 years ago. I’m 40 now. A rebound relationship produced my daughter, followed by my son two years later.
- Met my girlfriend’s parents for dinner at the Macaroni Grill in Scottsdale. Ratatouille with tumbler of Chianti. Stories of her mother’s acting career and her father’s loss of his place in the Guiness Book of World Records for longest yo-yo’ing marathon. I believe he said 24 hours of yo-yo’ing. A fun evening.
- Stopped by Kevin McGregor’s house, the same house where I lived as his roommate 2008-2009: The Dark Year. New furniture. Many improvement projects. New rehearsal studio in the garage. 7 month old baby in the crib. Last time I saw him we were fighting over business with The Earps and it got really nasty. None of that matters anymore. He looks very happy. A great storyteller, as usual.
A Brief Musical History of my Drummer Girlfriend
I hadn’t seen Jessica in 10 years. I met her and her then-husband, when they played in Monstar, sort of a co-ed punk/metal band I wasn’t really into, but they were great people and very friendly, I thought. I was playing for Jeff Dahl back then, when I wasn’t dealing with my then-girlfriend’s freakouts and Jerry Springer chaos. She and Jessica had actually been acquaintances. Jeff Dahl referred the all-girl punk band Hell on Heels to Jessica, after their drummer became pregnant and couldn’t tour. I believe Jeff was also at least partly responsible for getting Hell on Heels signed to legendary punk rock label Bomp! Records. Apparently, some other band had trademarked Hell on Heels, so they changed the name to Les Hell on Heels.
Local Phoenix media was all over Les Hell on Heels. Signed to Bomp!, working in Seattle with famed Nirvana producer Jack Endino, and surely the first Phoenix band to blow up nationally since The Refreshments.
Bomp! founder Greg Shaw passed away, leaving Les Hell on Heels an orphan band. They were still getting lots of airplay on Little Steven’s Underground Garage for their Jeff Dahl-written song “You Ain’t So Cool” and touring.
Lineup changes. The second album came out on Dionysus Records. I lost touch with Jessica and all the Hell on Heels girls except for Cheka.
Jessica moved to San Diego. I spoke to her briefly on the phone when she first moved there.
In the meantime, my band The Earps blew up locally in Phoenix. On a trip visiting her parents in Scottsdale, she saw the article about us in 944 Magazine and sent a MySpace message to me: “Hey, I just saw you in a magazine!”
Periodic brief contact via Facebook.
Sometime in 2015, I chatted with her on Facebook and tried to call her.
She said she would call me back later.
She did call back later. A YEAR later.
We talked about Eckhart Tolle, Buddhism, and music stuff. She flew out to Kentucky a month later, and we have been a long distance couple since June.
She is currently playing in Battered Suitcases (featuring members of Labor Party) and gigging semiprofessionally with Mancini the Band.
Meeting Battered Suitcases tomorrow.
Turning off the music:
“The deepest sound is silence. This may seem paradoxical only if we regard silence as an absence of life and vibration. But for a meditator, silence is sound unified with all of its opposites. It is both sound and soundlessness, and it is in this confluence that the power of meditation emerges.
From my Daily Stoic Workbook:
To the Stoics, oiêsis (false conceptions) are responsible not just for disturbances in the soul but for chaotic and dysfunctional lives and operations. When your efforts are not directed at a cause or a purpose, how will you know what to do day in and day out? How will you know what to say no to and what to say yes to? How will you know when you’ve had enough, when you’ve reached your goal, when you’ve gotten off track, if you’ve never defined what those things are?
-Ryan Holiday, Clarify Your Intentions, Daily Stoic
- One year of keeping this blog daily.
- Write a book.
- Pay off debts and save money.
- Better health in 2017.
Say ” No” to:
- Drama and dysfunction.
- Requests to play in bands.
- Frivolous spending.
- Excessive drinking.
- Facebook addiction.
Say “Yes” to:
- Waking up early.
- Cultivating a regular writing practice.
- Reading books and learning.
- Physical challenges and exercises.
See you tomorrow.